Special Campaign Notes
In the BLAGiverse, there are a number of changes to the base D&D system. most of these are role playing or storyline only changes that just make the game a little bit more enjoyable for everyone. After all, the point of BLAG is to have fun. Unless other wise stated, no special qualities confer any bonuses or penalties to a character unless he uses them in a really clever way, then they earned some kind of bonus.
Cheating is Allowed : No one really cares if you want to cheat, just expect it from the DM.
Don’t Talk to the Genie : Just don’t do it.
If the Book Doesn’t Say You Can’t Do It, You Can : As long as you aren’t in combat, you can do pretty much anything as long as there are no rules saying you can’t and it isn’t extremely damaging to the plot. This includes summoning the Genie by clapping (But Don’t talk to him), and a fighter teleporting across the room just for the hell of it. This should only apply if the player doing the goofy action can come up with a somewhat reasonable or at least funny explanation how. For example the fighter could say that he bought a discount toe ring of teleporation.
It’s Only Role Playing if You Say it in a Funny Voice : Enough said.
Sometimes the Funny Plan is Better Than the Smart Plan : For example, the players could storm a prison full of Castletown prisoners, but instead decide to disguise themselves as most definatly not the Old Kings. These kinds of plans are great for entertainment purposes and are more often than not will be alowed to succeed.
No Stat Block = Invulnerability : If the DM never signed stats to an NPC he cannot be attacked or take damage or fail skill checks. He can, however, be an incredible nuisance to the PC’s taunting them with his invulnerability.
New Alignments: For lack of better terms, the new alignments are Grotis and Beardy. Grotis can be commonly refered to as, kinda evil, while Beardy can be known as mostly good.
Physics and Science
Smearth and the Smoon
The Smoon is a giant barren boulder floating in the astral space above Smearth. The Smoon is not visible during the day but is there. The proof of this is the Smelevator, a length of cable running from the Smearth to the Smoon. Along this cable runs a large glass box suitable for 10 medium sized characters and their gear. With this anyone can travel from one end to another in 10 minutes. Should a character attempt to travel from one to another without the Smelevator should keep in mind that gravity will pull you towards the plane you most recently touched. So even if a character manages to come within a few inches of the Smoon, he will fall all the way back to Smearth if that is where he started from.
The home of the halflings, The Shire boasts the largest toy factories and candy plants in all of Smearth. It also boasts that it is a completely autonomous plane ever since the age of chaos. The entire Shire is a floating island in the sky, only about a mile off the ground. the Shire does not remain stationary either, it floats in a pattern that takes it to the same places once every year. Due to several accidents involving Frisbees, a railing was installed around the borders of the Shire.
The energy keeping the Shire afloat for so many years was dispelled a short time ago by adventurers, but he Halflings were prepared. The Shire is now kept aloft by hundreds of kites, some tied off to the ground, others carried by sugar crazed Halflings.
The Soha Pact, that once sought to annihilate all non-human life on Siverow, made extensive use of magic items known as Ring Gates for several very important purposes. The most well known use was to power their airships. By setting them up to form a loop and dropping in an orb of dark matter, the ring gates and accelerating metal would eventually form a directional magnetic turbine. The second, more sinister use, was never confirmed to be in use, but there were plenty of rumors. A similar loop would be created as the magnetic turbine, except the gates would be rigged to move closer to each other. Eventually, the gates would be closer together than the dark matter was wide, and the rapidly falling metal orb would not be able to sucessfuly exit one side of the gate before getting out of it’s own way. Rumors of the resulting explosion indicate that it could level all of Siverow.
Paladins are servants of divine beings who want their representatives looking good for other prospective worshipers. Dirt, filth and even rain will never hit a paladin, even the arterial spray of a beheaded Orc will seem to warp around him and hit party members not protected by this.
Antigenieum is a material found abundantly on the Elemental Plane of Cold. It’s presence prevents summoning Genasi via clapping. It is also a very brittle material that’s flakes can get lodged in peoples clothing and armor and prevent summoning for some time even after leaving the area of the Antigenieum.
Plottonium is a metal not found naturally on Smearth. It was manufactured by the Soha Nation because of it’s value for defending areas. It blocks teleportation of any kind through it. The wall that separates the Northern lands from the south was made primarily of this, though after years of people breaking through and general disrepair, the wall no longer blocks teleportation, except in a few places that are incredibly inconvenient. Bricks of Plottonium have been shipped to many other places to protects them similarly.
This material is made, disturbingly, from liquid gumdrops that are then frozen. The material is so supercharged with energy that it is rarely used by Gnomes, especially because it requires a sick Gnome to produce. Bombastium can also be eaten, though Gnomes will be grossed out, and each time it will have a different flavor.
All Gnomish technology shares two things in common. Each is equipped with engines that run solely on gumdrops, and each is capable of burrowing, through at least loose earth. The former is frequently problematic for those who do not have a large supply ready, as the only place to get gundrops is from Gnomish Outhouses.
This extremely rare material has not been crafted on Smearth for centuries, and the secret process of smelting hundreds of pounds of metal into a few feat of space has been lost to the ages. it is rumored that Dwarfvinci was the first to refine the rigorous process that was rumored to take a lifetime to complete. What little is know is that the process condenses nearly a ton of metal into the size and shape of a sword, hammer or other personal weapon. The smelting would take decades, and require special equipment and the strength and endurance to complete such a task. The resulting weapons were so heavy they required special enchantments just be moved, and they were so valuable that most of these enchantments included special conditions that only the person who owned the weapon could hoist it. The result of all this work, by both smith and alchemist, would be a weapon that could break worlds, so mighty that it rivaled the power of the old gods.
Soup and Blankets
One way the people of Smearth have found to keep warm in the winter months is to visit a Salvation Army base and get some free soup and blankets, then soak the blankets in the soup. Since the hot soup will stay hot until somebody blows on it, they can wear the blankets as ponchos and they will stay warm and toasty. Many people in Sohim Sarak have even installed pipes throughout their homes that pump the soup through the walls to heat their homes.
Temporary Hit Points
When a character gains temporary hit points from a source other than himself, he will take upon the alignment of the person who gave them to him. This can also be the general mannerisms of the person, such as a warlock gaining temporary hit points from a cleric of Pelor, he will act as though he loves Pelor for the duration.
These circles are tracked by each one having a 7 sigil address, commonly referred to as a gate address. When a gate opens it shoots out a vortex of obliteration, annihilating everything in its path. Teleportation gates can be blocked by covering them with a sheet of Plottonium, usually referred to as an Iris for some reason.
The directions used by Smearth, starting from up on the map and going clockwise, are Zorth, Zeast, Zouth, and Zest.
A horrible disease that strangely only effects PC’s, it’s symptoms are a total talk of control of ones self, usually in a catatonic state. Several instances have been reported of people with NPCism waking up only to donate strangely appropriate plot points and catch phrases. The disease usually lasts about one gaming session, but can be drawn out further by vacations and 9-5 jobs.